My book, Toxic Insecurity, will answer lots of those questions. The second half has lots of ideas to explore. If, however, you are interested in a traditional therapist, reach out and call them. Many therapists are happy to slide their fees. I would decide if you are interested in learning skills in the here and now to manage symtoms (cognitive behavioral therapy work) or if you want to do more in dept exploration of the subconscious. Psychodynamic therapists, those trained in relational psychoanalysis or well trained hypnotists can be a good fit. Trust your instincts — it takes a while to find the right people. The two people who helped me the most were my tango instructor and my singing coach — you never know where the healing actually happens!